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Friendships

Whilst flicking through my Grazia mag the other day I seen a statistic which said something along the lines of ‘you have the most friends when you are 26 years old’.

This got me think of my life and my friends -and I think I have to agree when I was 26 I had friends galore, work friends, old work friends, going out friends, University friends, school friends.. I was out all the time with them drinking, eating having a great time. I made friends quite easily. For me life was easy and fun.

Fast forward into my 30’s and I think I could count the number of good friends on one hand. Life is so different now, I don’t work full time anymore, I don’t live close to friends anymore I simply do not have much time. I guess everyone is the same. I think now if you want to be good friends with someone you have to make real effort with them, be there for the rough times as well as the good times, put up with the constant child interruptions which can make it impossible to have a proper conversation.

I suppose it makes me sad that some of those close friends in my 20’s were friends of the time rather than friends for life. I didn’t fall out with these friends we simply drifted, changed our lives changed.

I also find that I struggle to make friends so easy now, I suppose its not as easy when you haven’t got a vodka in you hand and your not dancing on a table. As much as I hate to admit it I am not as sparkly and exciting as I was in my twenties. Motherhood is hard and tiring and sometimes not that much fun (Can I really say that?!)

It does make me feel sad sometimes and even a bit lonely – but I know If I had to choose between a handful of  good close friends or a roomful of average friends I know what I would choose every time. Quality not quantity.

 

13 thoughts on “Friendships

  1. This is so true. It is so hard that you drift apart from all those 20’s friends unless of course you take the same path in life. You’re not alone though I feel the same and I still even live in the same town as I grew up but my life is different now and in some ways it would probably be easier to start again. #sharingthebloglove

  2. I’m exactly the same and it makes me sad sometimes. My friends from uni I was so so close to, and although we’re in touch, I wouldn’t say we’re close anymore – our lives are too different. I’m the only one who’s got married and had kids and I sometimes feel they look down on me a bit. But my closest friend doesn’t have kids either and we’re still really close, so perhaps it’s nothing to do with that. I definitely feel it’s so much harder to make new friends at this age – it often seems like people have their close friends already and probably don’t need any more! And yes, I often doubt whether I’m interesting enough for people to want to be friends with! Thanks for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove

  3. I completely agree I had far more friends in my twenties, but like you they were friends of a moment in time. I can count the number of friends I have on one hand. I do get sad that I don’t have that 1 friend who I can call at anytime, who has been there through everything. But life events have made that happen. Making friends at this time in my life is harder, becoming a mum seems to have taken all my confidence away. Thank you for joining us at #SharingtheBlogLove

  4. I’m currently 26 and I certainly don’t have Friends galore! Maybe I’m old before my time but the handful of friends which I have now are excellent friends. People who I wouldn’t want to be without! I just hope this isn’t my peak because my 30’s will be pretty lonely if it is!! #sharingthebloglove

  5. It’s true. But I am in my 40s now and I have really had to put myself out there to make new friends. Especially after we moved to Paris, that was tough, don’t give up! #SharingtheBlogLove

  6. I can definitely relate to this. I look back on my twenties and it was definitely when I had the most friends. It was easier to go out and socialise. It’s true though that many of them were friends of the time rather than friends for life. The ones I’ve stayed in touch most with have become my closest friends through and there are others who I rarely see, don’t keep in touch with very well but really enjoy spending time with when we do get together. I agree with you that quality is better than quantity but some days when motherhood feels lonely, I do miss those days of just being able to go out and know that there was always someone to meet up with. #sharingthebloglove

  7. This is spot on. I used to have lots more friends but honestly i’m not sad I have less now, I’m atually happier. The friends I have now are true friends. Ones I can talk about anything with, who accept me for all my flaws and I know would move mountains for me if I needed them. I love them with all my heart and wouldn’t trade even one of them for 20 of the old friends I grew apart from now I know what true friendship can be. xx #sharingthebloglove

  8. Yeh I think I have less close friends now definitely. I still have some but they’re more acquaintances. It’s hard living away from school and uni friends but I still count my uni mates as my closest even though I rarely see them. Don’t worry though, my parents are in their mid 60s and seem to have more friends than ever now from meeting people on holiday! So maybe we have that to look forward to?! #SharingtheBlogLove

  9. That’s interesting. I don’t think I have fewer friends, I just don’t see them so often. We still keep in touch. I guess I was never a social butterfly when I was younger. I had a handful of really close friends. I still do have the same handful of close friends and a few more. Pen x #globalblogging

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