I always feel a little bit sorry for my second born child Harriet. Since she has been born she been rushed around from pillar to post to accommodate Meme’s busy social life. When Meme was younger, me and my husband would spend many an hour sitting in our car letting Meme have a nap but, with Harri, she hasn’t had the luxury, she gets taken out of the car straight away asleep or not – we don’t have that spare time anymore.
Life as a Second born child
I remember Meme used to sleep in until about 8.30 when she was younger. Poor Harri is woken at 7am and is fed and dressed in a rush to allow Meme to get to school on time. She is dropped off at Nanas when Meme has a party. Lots of her clothes are Meme’s hand me downs, she barely went to a baby group when she was little. Only this weekend she had to sit through a 3 hour dance show so we could see Meme dance ….the list goes on… sometimes it just doesn’t seem fair!
It is not that we love her any less or that she isn’t important – she is. My second born child Harri holds such a special place in my heart she is my baby. I guess we just don’t have the time like we used to now we are a family of four. Life is a constant juggle trying to fit everything in.
I am always conscious of the second born child – more particularly the middle child. Being the second born of three and I do always remember feeling a little bit unsure of myself.
I wasn’t the eldest reaching all those milestones first but I wasn’t the baby of the family lapping up those extra snuggles. My Dad gets cross when I say this but I do think middle child syndrome exists (not through any fault of theirs it is just how I felt at times) and, whilst this does not apply to Harri, I am conscious that being the second born she still feels as important as Meme and has the same opportunities. As a parent, just because we have done it before doesn’t mean that it isn’t just as special second time around.
Since Meme started school I have finally had some Mummy and Harri time which we have both really enjoyed. I feel like our relationship has gotten much stronger. It has definitely highlighted the importance of one on one time with both my girls. I also realise there are benefits to having an older sibling. Harri has grown up with a playmate, someone who is always ready to play with her. She has had an endless amount of toys from the day she was born and, let’s not forget, she also has much more laid back chilled out parents (instead of the neurotic crazy parents we were with Meme).
I know it wont be this way forever. We will be running her around after her before we know it, celebrating her dance shows, taking her to friends parties. I know that my Harri’s time will come…..